John awoke suddenly, as if a bit of internal clockwork had just sounded off an alarm inside him. Looking over at the clock on his nightstand, he sat up and blinked his eyes a few times. Then he stood to his feet. It was 2:57 am … in the middle of the night. It was time.
He walked over to the bedroom door, wide open as he had left it when he went to bed. The upstairs hallway was so quiet he could hear the faint noise of crickets outside. Taking slow steps, he walked across the hall into the nursery – the nursery door having been closed but not the whole way.
Walking into the nursery, he squinted his eyes just a little – still trying to find a focus to his vision … something he would certainly need in just a moment. He heard steady, rhythmic breathing in the room – the sounds of peaceful slumber being had.
The nursery was illuminated by a blue canary nightlight, giving the glow of sapphire blue to everything in the room. It was only partially furnished but what was there had already found a home it belonged in. The glow-in-the-dark stars on the ceiling, having run through their charge by this hour, formed the constellation of the Heavens above. Straight ahead was the wooden changing table he had built for her by hand, carving moons and stars into its sides to compliment the astrological theme she had chosen for the nursery.
Walking over to the changing table, he retrieved a few things from the stacks of supplies on the shelves below. And then he walked over to the crib, also made of wood but painted with a soft shade of lavender. The mattress cover, as well as the pillow cover and the crib sheets, were adorned with designs of shooting stars and smiling moons. And resting on those crib sheets was his beloved wife and BabyGirl … Jane.
They had met at an ageplay munch. In amongst a group of 20 or so people, Jane smiled across the table at him. It was the kind of smile that told him she was interested in him. He smiled back and they started talking that night. She told him later, that he caught her eye the moment he walked into that bar.
Looking down at her asleep in that crib, his heart melted for her, the love he felt for her far exceeding that which any regular husband felt for his wife. He was her Daddy as well, had become her best friend and her soulmate, in the mix.
They dated for almost a year, kept attending those ageplay munches, got engaged, got married and lived in an apartment for the first three years of their marriage. They were a head-over-heels helpless Daddy-n-BabyGirl couple, so madly in love with each other that the rest of the world had become background noise. Jane was almost always in a diaper. She loved them more than she could put to words. And she was often little minded, but sometimes she got very sexual in nature. And no matter which train of thought she was on, John always guided her along – not allowing her to go so far in any direction as to lose touch with reality.
Jane had turned over onto her back and was so settled into that position she likely had been on her back for a while. But she was a tummy sleeper. So when she turned over onto her back while sleeping, it meant one thing and one thing only … she needed her diaper changed. And this was why John was presently in the nursery, why he woke up at 3am. He did this every night and every night, she needed changed.
Her knees were bent slightly, bowing outward. Her smooth legs rode up to the swollen, soggy diaper at her center. The little white cotton babydoll nightie he had put her in at bedtime had ridden up her belly just enough to show her navel and the star piercing she got on their very first date. Her stomach moved with each steady, even breath she took – indicative of how deeply she was breathing … in that her stomach muscles were aiding it.
Quietly lowering the side railing of the crib, he cupped the underside of her diaper – smiling at the confirmation. She was an angel, never once resisting the limitations of being a BabyGirl and always reaping the benefits of the same.
Her arms were bent at the elbows, her hands resting on either side of her head on the pillow – her fingers curled up into soft fists. Her head was turned to the side and her chin was angled upward, but very strangely. It was as if she was stretching her neck to get to something that was just out of her reach.
Then he saw what she was reaching for … with her mouth. The tip of the nipple of her pacifier was just barely nestled between her lips. So he pushed the pacifier back between her lips and she took the nipple into her mouth contentedly, shifting into a position of greater comfort – as if an enormous struggle had just ended for her.
Setting down what was in his left hand between her bowed legs on the mattress, John reached to her diapered hips and unfastened the tapes. She whimpered softly but didn’t stir awake.
“Shh. Shh. Shhh,” he shushed her, keeping the volume of his voice soft as to not make a loud noise that would awaken her.
He remembered the first time he changed her diaper, so many years ago.
Folding down the front of her wet diaper, he immediately took a baby wipe to the front of her body before the coolness of air rushed over her mound before he could wipe her clean. Jane sighed serenely but didn’t stir awake. Lifting her legs-n-bottom up in the air and, while holding her legs up with pinched ankles, he slid the wet diaper beneath her down to the foot board of the crib … out of the way. Then he took another baby wipe to her bottom, cleaning both of her cheeks and then her middle. He was in no particular hurry and didn’t want to make sudden movements that might awaken her.
Her first diaper change took place in the back of his SUV in that restaurant parking lot on their first date. She was so nervous that someone would see them. But he was a steady rock about it.
Holding her legs up with his right hand, he picked up the new diaper he got from the shelves below the changing table with his left hand. Unfolding it with expert efficiency, he placed the new diaper flat to the crib mattress and slid the back waistline up to her lower lumbar. He was a seasoned pro at this and knew what he was doing. She breathed in deeply through her nose but didn’t stir awake.
He remembered how she covered her face with her hands as he unfastened her diaper for that first change in his SUV. She had misplaced her pacifier. So, her whimpers were a bit more audible. She was absolutely adorable for her reactions to her helplessness and vulnerability as he also was in no particular hurry during that diaper change either.
Still holding her legs and bottom up in the air, he took baby powder to her bottom – caressing it out gently and evenly across her cheeks. Feeling the silky coolness on what was a wet bottom just moments ago, Jane melted into the crib mattress – her spine relaxing and her body going limp. Easing her bottom into the powdery softness of the innards of her diaper, he brought her legs back to the mattress – returning them to their bowed position. She smiled brightly behind her pacifier but didn’t stir awake, the gentleness of this diaper change becoming a part of the dream she was having.
John remembered the day she asked him for a nursery. He told her that they needed to buy a house first. And though this wasn’t what she wanted to hear, she accepted it – as it made very good sense.
Taking powder to her front, he repeated the same gentle caress – evening the powder from hip to hip and then down between her legs. Folding the front of her diaper up and into place, he fastened the tapes snuggly at her hips – enveloping her in new softness, fresh with new baby powder.
Oh, what a happy BabyGirl she was.
Wiping his hands clean of powder, he put all the wipes inside the wet diaper and rolled it up into a taped ball. Then he put his hands on the sides of her rib cage, first gently sitting her up and then lifting her up into his arms. Instinctively, Jane wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist, resting the side of her face on his sternum and nursing on her pacifier … still not having stirred awake.
Scooping up the balled-up wet diaper, he headed for the nursery door – stopping and looking back at the room for a moment with a warm smile of continuing accomplishment.
When they bought this house three months ago, John honored his promise and got to work on building her a nursery right away. No sooner had they moved in than he started building the crib – followed by the changing table.
The nursery still wasn’t done, but Jane had been sleeping in it every night for several weeks now. He would put her in her crib at bedtime and there she would remain … until 3am, when he changed her diaper and then carried her back to their bedroom to sleep until morning.
This was their routine, one of many that enabled them to embrace all they could be and all they would ever want to be.
Continue on to Part Two