here is a little story about what you know, about what you remember, and about what you learn ……. again.
The Things You Learn … Again –
Wednesday, September 30th
This was a very important day for Rose. It wasn’t the most important day of her life. In many ways, however, it was the most important day of the rest of her life. Tomorrow had become the goal and every day seemed like a quest to get there.
It wasn’t about the date. The last day of September was no different than any other day of the year. But Rose had made a few promises to Emmitt as well as to herself. And with some well-influenced determination, she was going to make good on every single promise she pledged.
Three months prior, at the end of June, Rose sustained some rather serious injuries from a fall from a horse. Slipping into a coma, she spent the whole summer in this stupid North Carolina hospital. When she woke up, she wasn’t paralyzed but all of her muscles had atrophied. So it gave her the same feel of paralysis … or, in a more macabre way to put it – the same lack of feel as paralysis.
She would battle back, spending weeks now being exercised in a bed, helpless to do anything for herself. Little by little, her nerve-endings awakened and with them, came pain. Rose couldn’t remember the last day she had been medication-free. But what she could remember, vividly and clearly, were those needles … oh those bazillion needles of acupuncture – yet another treatment to get her body back to a recovered status.
This was the recap playing over and over in Rose’s mind as she was wheeled into the rehabilitation room on the second floor of the Carolinas Medical Center. But there were two things that remained at the forefront of her thoughts as she eyed up all the equipment in that room she would shortly be using.
The first thought was of the many sessions she had with a hospital psychiatrist in the past two weeks: talking of the accident, of her fears of getting back on a horse and most importantly, of rebuilding her own confidence.
The second thought was of the joy of being in a diaper again and no longer being kept uncomfortable with those two catheters inside her. Rehab had begun and the muscles at her core would need to be re-strengthened as well. So the catheters had to go. This would certainly lead to a lot of diaper changes – esteem-killing situations that Rose happily knew wouldn’t kill her esteem at all.
Yes, this was a very important day for Rose because on this day, she would stand on her feet, for the first time since the end of June. And … with both physical and emotional support, she would take her first step.
Sitting in the wheelchair and staring wide-eyed at everything within the rehab room, Rose could feel her pulse racing as she watched Olivia, her rehab nurse, readying some of the stations. Emmitt stood alongside Rose, seeing her already becoming overwhelmed by the moment – not so much for the how-to-do of it all, but more so for the can I do any of this? mentality she was desperately working on conquering.
“Ya excited, Rose Petal?” Emmitt asked with softened tone, holding her right hand as best as he could – given the wrists braces she wore.
Rose was actually wearing several braces on her body for that day. She had braces on both of her arms, starting in the middle of her palms and going half-way up her forearms. She also had more elaborate braces on the lower half of her body, beginning at her hips – then traveling down to connect again at the middle of her thighs, bending with moveable parts at her knees and traveling down once more to her ankles where the braces were connected to a pair of shoes.
Needless to say, the braces were a bit clunky and might not have been necessary at all. Thus far, Rose’s muscles had responded well to the treatments. But she had always been lying in bed and her treatments had consisted of manual manipulation by a nurse, medication and those God-awful needles. But today, Rose would begin a more active and physical role in her rehabilitation.
Her back and neck had no braces at all, her spine having been given some serious attention recently with deep-reaching massages to the lumbar, thoracic and cervical regions of her back. These weren’t gentle massage, by any means. And they were a far cry from anything she would have received at a spa.
“Okay, Rose. It’s time to begin. Are you ready? Are you excited?” Olivia asked, walking over to her.
“I think I’m a little more scared than excited, to be honest,” Rose said with tear-filled eyes, first looking up at Olivia and then to Emmitt.
“Fear is a big part of it. And it will be the first thing you overcome,” Olivia said supportively, wheeling the chair over to the parallel rails in the middle of the room.
Then Olivia knelt down in front of Rose and lifted the girl’s feet off the leg rests of the wheelchair. Detaching the leg rests and setting them aside, she eased Rose’s feet onto the floor. Rose could feel the pressure of the soles of her feet as they contacted the bottoms of her shoes. She smiled, already streaming tears.
“Is everything okay?” Olivia asked with a sweet tone, being very gentle with Rose’s emotions as the psychiatrist had made it known in her report that Rose was as emotional fragile as glass.
Another nurse walked into the rehab room right at that moment, a tall blonde bombshell who kept her beautiful appearance toned down.
“I can actually feel my feet,” Rose said with a shaky tone, sniffling for a second and then breaking out into laughter.
“It feels good to … feel. Doesn’t it?” Olivia asked, sharing the laugh with Rose as she motioned for the nurse to come over.
“Except when it hurts,” Rose admitted. “But … no pain, no gain. I guess, huh?”
“You bet. You ready to stand up for the first time?” Olivia asked, positioning herself on Rose’s left side as the other nurse positioned herself on Rose’s right side. “Rose, this is Julia. She and I are going to give you a little help this first time. Okay?”
“Okay,” Rose said, taking in a deep breath – Olivia and Julia taking hold of the center of the girl’s forearms and placing a supportive hand behind each of her shoulder blades. “Here we go.”
Oh, this was a big moment. And Rose knew already it was going to be excruciatingly painful. She swore the medication they gave her sometimes was so mild in dosage that a piece of chalk would’ve done more to deaden the pain.
“It’ll be okay, Rose,” Julia said with a soft and sweet voice.
Rose closed her eyes, preparing herself for the lightning strikes of pain to come. When her nerve endings first started working again, the pings of pain would always happen in a straight line – up the back of her legs or down her back or anywhere that a connected series of muscles existed in her body. Since all her muscles were connected, that meant the streaks of pain happened everywhere and anywhere they wanted.
She leaned forward, her knees leaning forward with her as her weight shifted onto her feet. She could feel a rush of blood traveling down her body … or so the sensation inside her made her feel was happening.
Lifting her diapered bottom up off the seat of the wheel chair, Rose winced as she felt the muscles in her hamstrings tighten. Pushing her forearms down for further leverage, she took a brief moment of pause to catch her breath and allow the pain to dissipate just a bit.
Breathing through the pain never seemed more logical as just then.
Dr. Irvin, the doctor who had been making routine visits to see her since she woke up on Labor Day, was absolutely correct. Without the leg muscles being strong, there was no way Rose was ever going to stand up.
And at that moment, with her body at a half-mast stance, Rose was able to maintain that position because her leg muscles had been strengthened since the very beginning of her recovery.
“Keep standing up, Rose,” Olivia insisted. “Don’t get stuck in that position.”
Rose whimpered a little as she kept trying to straighten her legs, the nerve-endings on the sides of her back coming alive as her back muscles began to take a little of the strain.
“That’s a girl good. Keep going,” Olivia said with a gentle and supportive tone, coddling Rose’s China glass emotions.
“I can’t,” Rose said, beginning to sob a bit more heavily, the pain in her back increasing steadily.
“Keep trying,” Julia said encouragingly.
“It hurts too much,” Rose said, tears welling up in her eyes.
But giving it her best and fueled with determination, Rose began to lean up some more – tightening the muscles in her thighs and beginning to straighten her torso. This movement brought the muscles of her lower lumbar into full play and thusly, the nerve-endings in her lower lumbar as well.
“Oww,” Rose squealed. “I can’t do it. I have to sit back down. Please let me sit back down.”
Her pleads were so absent of pride they sounded more like the begging to give up as opposed to the begging to try again. Olivia had helped many, many patients get through this first stage of recovery. And it was never easy on her, either. But Olivia knew that if Rose sat back down, she would return to a state from a few weeks ago – when her self-worth was in greater need of repair than her body was.
Olivia and Julia could give her all the encouragement in the world, but they couldn’t hold her up forever and as Rose began to sink back towards the wheel chair, they both gave it one final shot to convince her to do otherwise.
“Rose, you were almost there,” Olivia said, hoping the girl would change her mind.
“Yeah, almost isn’t good enough. I can’t do it … not yet,” Rose snapped back at her, not only losing her composure but also getting emotional.
“Try again. Try one more time, Rose, and you’ll do it,” Julia said with last-attempt encouragement.
“No I won’t. And no I’m not going to,” Rose said bitterly, beginning to sink further back towards the wheel chair.
Then another voice in the room spoke up.
“Rosie,” Emmitt said, his deep southern twang ringing in her ears and freezing her in her half-mast, defeated position. “It’s time for ya to stand up.”
With little determination left but also with an inability to deny Emmitt her recovery, Rose found the will power she had been lacking.
“Yes, Daddy,” she whispered, too softly for Olivia and Julia to hear but loud enough for Rose’s heart to hear.
And with an initial squeal of pain, Rose straightened her back completely, lifting her head up and with it, her pride.
“Go easily. Go slow,” Olivia said with tenderness but also with excitement for the return of Rose’s confidence.
Rose closed her eyes and tears streamed down her cheeks as she began to tighten her leg muscles and straighten her legs. She rose higher and higher towards a full standing position, Olivia and Julia sliding their supporting hands down her back – giving her a sense of security that she wouldn’t fall backwards.
“You’re almost there, Rose,” Olivia whispered to her. “That’s a good girl. Look how well you’re doing.”
Rose opened her eyes and stood up the rest of the way, her back cracking up a storm at that moment, but giving her no pain at all. The nurses praised her for having gotten to her feet – Olivia speaking to her as if she was a child.
In many ways, Rose had the mentality of a child, just then. And, to no surprise for Olivia since she had been clued in on the real meaning behind the Daddy and BabyGirl name exchanges between Rose and Emmitt, the coddling had a greater effect on Rose than it normally did on most patients.
Rose was spoken to with that same wonderful praising all the time by Emmitt. And in some of the most difficult days Rose had experienced since she met Emmitt last year, it was his Daddy Voice, with rich tone and committed intent, that always carried her through the trials of her life. Even when she was just feeling moody some days, he always had the ability to win her heart over.
But an even bigger challenge still was right in front of her. And I would take vision beyond what eyesight could provide to teach her what she needed to learn … again.
Continue on to The Silence That Spoke Volumes
Also, read: “What To Do With A Miracle”…………………………….. The Country Rose Series .
Country Rose Country Rose 2 Country Rose 3 Country Rose 4 Country Rose 5 Country Rose 6
If you like The Country Rose Series, I’d also recommend checking out two other ABDL Romance series: