Melting an Ice Queen –
Faith tilted her head back and drained the Bud Light Lime in her hand.
“That makes a six pack, Faith,” Guy said, looking at the other five empty bottles on the table.
“Shut up,” she said, sniffling as she waved the bottle in the air at the bartender who brought her another one.
“Slow down, girl,” the bartender said, setting another beer in front of her. “It’s not gonna change anything to make someone carry you out of here.”
“Why not?” Faith sassed back. “Maybe then, I’d get lucky for good.”
Faith was just a few days out from a relationship with the fifth boyfriend in two years. And, by her own admission, was drinking away the memories of him.
Every relationship seemed to yield the exact same result. It started out well and she was happy. Then, part way through it, she made a wrong move, overstepping her bounds and shooting from the hip. It was her nature to do whatever she wanted and say whatever she wanted and everything always went downhill from there.
In the end, she was left with the memories of another guy who truly, deeply hurt her. And no matter how much she drank, bitterness remained from all of her disappointments. What made it worse was that no matter where she went, she was likely to run into someone from her past. When this happened, she always had to run away.
But with each relationship, she grew a bit. And she vowed to not make the same mistakes again.
“Faith, can I ask you something?” Guy asked, cautiously, for the moment at least.
“Sure,” she replied with a cold tone. “I got nothing better to do tonight.”
“What went wrong with Mike?” he asked boldly of her most recent break-up.
“What do you mean?” she asked back with a scowl on her face.
“You’ve told me in the past that you feel you make mistakes at the wrong time and that’s what seems to end things,” he explained.
“Yeah … so?” she asked with attitude.
“What were the mistakes with Mike?” he asked.
She had no response.
“You have no idea, do you?” he asked.
“What’s your point?” Faith asked him.
“My point is you’ve never taken time to learn what goes wrong,” Guy answered. “And when situations arise in the future which could spell trouble, they always destroy the good thing you have.”
“So are you saying I’m destined to fail?” she asked. “So I don’t know what to do sometimes! So I do things I shouldn’t! Are you telling me I sabotage my relationships?”
“No,” Guy answered, allowing her the time to rant.
“Then spit it out!” Faith shouted coldly. “Why don’t you tell me what it is about me that ruins every damn bit of happiness I get my hands on?”
Guy paused before beginning.
“You are a control freak,” he said bluntly. “And you chase guys off after a while.”
“Is that wrong?” she asked with boiling anger. “I shouldn’t have to change who I am to please anyone. And I shouldn’t she have to apologize for who I am, either.”
“Faith,” he started with sudden aggression of his own. “Everyone should apologize for who they are because everyone does things they shouldn’t and says things they shouldn’t.”
He paused for a moment to allow her time to think about it before continuing.
“And no one is above that truth,” he said. “Unless, they’re an ice queen.”
“What’s an ice queen?” Faith asked, calming down and realizing that, regardless of whether she believed what he said applied to her or not, he was likely speaking truth.
“An ice queen is a girl who doesn’t realize she’s domineering. She will be cold because she feels like it and whomever she affects because of this will need to deal with it because in her mind it isn’t her problem,” he continued. “I’m not saying this is your situation, but the truth is: people who are controlling and as cold as ice are actually some of the most insecure individuals in the world. And if they ever let down their guard to show the slightest bit of emotion, their ice would melt.”
“Okay, maybe I am an ice queen, but it’s not true that I’m insecure and my world wouldn’t melt if I showed a softer side,” Faith said, standing her ground.
“Would you like to test that claim?” Guy asked, initiating the challenge.
“Yeah, I would,” Faith answered, determined now to prove she knew herself better than anyone.
“I bet you that in one night’s time, I can transform you from an ice queen into the most helpless and submissive soul you could possibly imagine,” Guy said, picking up his beer. “And … after you have melted, you will be happier than you have ever been in your life.”
“You’re on, but no sex,” Faith declared.
“Is everything else fair game?” Guy asked.
“Yep,” Faith replied with perhaps her most dominant state of mind ever.
“Deal,” Guy said as they clanked their beer bottles. “Tomorrow night then?”
“Sure. What time?” Faith asked.
“I’ll pick you up at 5 pm,” Guy replied with a grin.
“I’ll be ready,” she said confidently. “And I promise you, you will not be able to break my ice, nor will you get me to enjoy anything.”
“Girl,” Guy started. “Tomorrow night at this time, you will see life as a puddle of water, unable to freeze up again.”
“Wow. You’re really conceded,” Faith laughed at his cockiness. “What makes you so sure you can melt me?”
“I’m not sure, but when I look in your eyes, I see a girl who has never felt love – not like she could have. She’s hidden her heart with an icy outer shell because she doesn’t want to appear as weak.” Guy stated honestly, seeing her eyes tear up at hearing the truth. “I’m not conceded, but I know the tough love which can melt an ice queen.”
The Following Night –
Faith looked at the time on her phone. She sat at the end of the kitchen table, keeping the front door in her line of view. She was a bit anxious about the events of that night, especially since she didn’t know what they were going to be.
A lot of her animosity last night came from being a little drunk and she was hoping Guy wasn’t angry with her. Through each relationship and through so many other things in life, he had been a really good friend to her.
Faith knew how she got sometimes and she often referred to her life as having been a rollercoaster ride. It was just that Guy had never before called her out on any of the decisions she made. Perhaps this was what had her shaken up so much. Guy wouldn’t have challenged her without a purpose. And he wouldn’t put her on the spot to make fun of her.
As she waited for him, her mind was flooded with honest thoughts that he just might be right. Maybe she was an ice queen. Maybe that was the reason behind a lot of her shortcomings. But she couldn’t change the way she was. She would need help and some serious help to correct this.
And it was at that moment that she put it all together. That’s what this night was about. Guy was helping her in a manner that he knew she would never accept. And that’s why he made a bet out of it … to get her to agree to it.
He had no other motives. There would be no sex, nor any benefit for him. They hadn’t wagered money or drinks or anything. And as the doorbell rang, she remembered back to the final thing he said at the bar last night:
“I know the tough love which can melt an ice queen.”
She walked to the front door, keeping her composure and preparing herself to no longer show the insecurities she said she didn’t have.
“You’re late,” she said with a sly look in her eye as she opened the door.
“You’re impatient,” Guy returned her slyness with. “May I come in?”
“Sure,” she said with indifference.
“Let me get a look at you,” Guy said, setting down the small back pack he brought with him as she closed the front door and turned back to him.
She placed her hands on her hips and modeled her outfit, turning in a circle. She had gone a bit more conservative in her choices for the night. Usually, she flaunted herself far more than the blue jeans, tan light sweater and brown leather ankle boots currently allowed her to. But she had done her hair and make-up in the usual turn all the boys’ heads fashion she was known for.
“Am I acceptable?” she asked with a playful sass.
“Yes, you’re beautiful as always,” Guy said, eyeing her up and down. “But tonight’s a bit different.”
“How is it different?” Faith asked, putting her hands back on her hips.
“Tonight, you going to do what you’ve never done before,” Guy said, picking up the small back pack and taking her by the hand.
“And what is it that I’ve never done?” she asked as he led her back the hallway to her bedroom.
“Tonight, you’re gonna let your guard down,” he said as they walked into her bedroom.
He shut the door and set the small back pack on the edge of her bed before turning back to her and taking both of her hands in his.
“And you’re going to do something else new as well,” he added, pausing for a moment. “You’re going to show the meaning of your name.”
“I’ve trusted people before,” she stated as he sat her down on the side of the bed and knelt in front of her, sliding the leather ankle boots off her feet. “Look at all the good it’s done for me.”
“I’m not here to talk about what you’ve done in the past. It didn’t work. So why bring it up?” he asked, taking hold of the lower hem of her sweater. “Arms up.”
She lifted her hands towards the ceiling, trying to get an idea of what he was up to. Her sweater was off her body before she had another second to think about it. Then he eased her down on the bed, unbuttoning her jeans, lowering the zipper and sliding them off her legs.
“What are you doing?” she asked as he had stripped her down to her panties and her bra.
“Your outfit needs to match what’s in her heart,” Guy said, turning her over onto her belly before pulling her legs off the side of the bed and making her kneel.
He opened the small back pack and reached inside it, causing her to react.
“Hey, I said NO SEX!” she snapped, turning on her hip and looking up at him.
“We’re not going to have sex,” Guy stated as he turned her back onto her tummy. “But you need to learn manners which you obviously were never taught.”
Pinning her wrists to her lower back with his left hand, he lifted his right hand in the hair and swung his arm down, connecting his palm squarely across the center of bottom.
“Hello? Ouch?” she sassed, fidgeting and trying to break her wrists free from his grasp.
But he held her down, delivering a second smack to her bottom which was twice as hard as the first. Then, he delivered a third smack which hurt so badly she stopped fighting him.
She felt a warmth spread across her cheeks that soon traveled part way down the back of her thighs. The fourth smack left a sting and she stopped moving all together, realizing that she would need energy if she was going to get through this.
A fifth smack landed across her cheeks and he held his hand firmly against her bottom as she whimpered softly, trying to fight back tears.
“Sass has gotten you nowhere. It’s time to turn over a new leaf. Tonight, every time you go back to your old habits, you’ll be corrected for it,” he said lowering the back of her panties to mid-thigh. “The next time you speak or show sass, you’ll get 10 smacks … with my belt.”
The thought of being spanked again was a riveting one as it passed through her mind. The added thought of being spanked with his belt made her shudder and she lowered her head to the mattress, opting to comply … for the moment at least, her bottom, reddened and stinging, kept the first five smacks fresh in her mind and therefore fresh in her decisions.
He reached into the small back pack and took out a butt plug, but it wasn’t a typical one. It had a hole in the center of it.
“What is that?” she asked, softly and gently, as to not use sass.
“This is a plug, but it’s not designed to keep anything in,” he said while parting her bottom cheeks with his left hand. “It’s actually designed to make things come out.”
He slowly inserted it into her rosebud, allowing her time to wince at the pain and get used to being spread open. With a hollow center, it made sense that the plug would prevent her from controlling her bowels. This thought kept rippling through her mind until her sass returned.
“So you’re going to make me shit myself? That’s your ice melting method?” she asked with a feisty tone as she turned her neck to look up at him.
He didn’t reply with words, seeing that she was traveling down the usual route of talking her way out of situations. Instead, he took her wrists and pinned them to her lower back again as he unfastened the buckle of his belt.
She turned her head away from him, growing wide-eyed and staring at the bedroom wall across the bed. She could hear the leather sliding out of each loop. The pain in her bottom returned with greater sting at the mere thought of what was to come.
He folded the belt in half, gripped the end of it firmly with his right hand, lifted his arm and struck the leather squarely across the center of her bottom. She shook slightly, biting her lip at the new layer of pain which shot out across her skin.
The second strike of leather landed across the back of her thighs, on skin not yet affected. She fidgeted, trying to find a place to send the pain. Her heart was pounding and she now pressed her lips together to keep from crying aloud.
The third strike landed across her bottom again and her legs collapsed from their struggle. She rested her knees on the floor, trying desperately to keep her body from tensing up in anticipation of the next strike.
The fourth strike landed and her lips burst open as she whimpered from the pain. Her breathing became erratic as she struggled for air through her crying.
In her most angered moments, she always found a way to deal with the emotion by becoming … an ice queen. Shutting off the feeling and disregarding it made for an easy purge every time. But Guy had removed her usual coping mechanism and she was left to deal with the emotion, instead of running away from it.
The fifth strike ushered in the pain of numbness. Being numb usually lessened the severity of something, but feeling the strikes landing on her without the sting began to send confusion through her senses. The emotional was now overtaking the physical.
The sixth strike welled up the tears in her eyes and for the first time in her life, Faith found herself at the edge of losing her composure, not for the usual nonchalant bitterness for which she was known, but for the weakness within she had always hidden.
The seventh strike produced the constant whimpers which almost immediately turned to crying. And then, her mind lost the ability to process the pain, the numbness and the correction. Her thoughts slowed down and she felt reality unraveling for her. She wasn’t scared for where her head would wind up and perhaps for the first time, she anticipated the chance to get beyond a point of emotion which had always controlled her.
The eighth strike brought the words he had used to mind again: helpless and submissive. Her submission was obvious, given that she wasn’t fighting the spanking, but also that she was losing the desire and want to fight it.
But it was the helplessness which kept her guessing. She was beginning to believe she had no other choice but to listen to him. And the clarity of decisions which she always had, whether right or wrong, was slipping from her conscience. Soon, she wouldn’t be able to reason on her own and she would look to him for guidance.
The ninth strike sent a tingle through her center, further confusing her. Was this turning into something pleasurable? Did that make any sense at all?
The tenth strike ended with a crack so loud that it snapped her back to the moment and reminded her of how much pain she was in, not just physically, but now, emotionally.
She lied on her side, sniffling as she recovered. Her ears were still ringing and her eyes, closed for memory of the experience, were replaying the emotions of what had just happened. She knew then that she wouldn’t sass or fight him anymore. She disregarded his warning and called his bluff. And for doing so, she learned that he meant what he said.
As he turned her over on her back, he slid her panties off and took out a pacifier from the bag, placing it in her mouth and silencing her whimpers.
“Shh, shh, shh,” he shushed her, wiping the tears from her cheeks with the usual gentleness she knew him to have. “How’s the ice queen doing now?”
His words, slightly humiliating, shot through her senses and she tingled again – conflicting with her natural-born independence to resist and her discovered impulsive need to submit. Both ways of thinking suddenly felt right and she remained torn as to which way to go.
She nursed on the pacifier, looking up at him with fear, but also attachment – another conflict she wrestled with. He had hurt her, but in doing so, may have also set her free from something which hurt worse – bitterness from a failed past, and in the mix … guilt.
She watched him taking out a diaper from the small back pack and a few other things which seemed out of the ordinary, but reasoning was gone for the time being and she found herself facing a decision he said she would face … trust.
He unfolded the diaper and parted her thighs, placing the diaper flat on the mattress beneath her. He seemed to be moving in slow motion as he sat next to her and bent her knees, drawing them up to her chest.
He picked up a small tube of ointment and began applying it to her bottom. She looked in his eyes, seeing them filled with a kindness that made clear how he understood the struggles within which she faced. His hands were controlling but gentle and she found herself filled with a greater attachment to him.
He was taking care of her. No one had ever taken care of her. He was giving to her. Everyone had always taken from her. And this was the main reason she had always mounted up defenses which people viewed as the stuff a real bitch was made of.
She felt people had forever been judging her without once wearing her shoes and without truly understanding why she was the way she was. Guy had been her friend for years and only now stepped in to make a statement.
Sliding the diaper underneath her, he took out a bottle of powder from the small back pack. Her eyes wandered over to the back pack, wandering what else was inside it. Her nose took in the sweet scent as his fingers caressed the powder over her tender and throbbing skin.
This was a tenderness she had never felt. Neanderthal sex was about the only intimacy she had ever received. And while it had its place, there was never anything else – not like this, not something which touched her heart so deeply.
He took the powder to her front with the same caressing glide, from hip to hip and down between her legs. And then he stood to his feet, lifting the front of the diaper up and into place, fastening it at her hips and patting her between the legs – another action which sent a feeling through her, similar to humiliation but in a gentler sense.
He took out a pair of white leggings, gathering them up in his hands and slipping them onto her feet. The leggings reached the top of her thighs, pressing in just tightly enough to remind her of the tenderness on the back of her legs. The other end of the leggings had a lace design on the edge and wrapped around her ankles snuggly.
He reached behind her, placing one hand on the small of her back and the other hand behind her neck as he sat her up. Her eyes showed an admiration for him and a mesmerizing gaze that revealed how the treatment was affecting her.
He took out a soft pink dress from the back pack. It was flouncy and a bit short, but she lifted her hands to the ceiling, receiving its dressing with another state of mind all together new to her – acceptance. And with the new-found trust in her heart, she was beginning to see the benefits of melting.
He stood her to her feet and she stepped into his chest, embracing him. The warmth of his body and the beating of his heart felt as good as the softness of the clothing she wore. He held her in his arms for a few minutes, rocking her back and forth while reaching under her dress and gently patting her diapered bottom – a gesture she hoped he would do often for how good it made her feel. It was almost as if those pats were the equivalent of him telling her he was happy with her, perhaps even … proud of her.
They made their way to his car. And as they drove off, she began to put together what had happened. The spankings hurt, but they enabled her to break through emotions which she always struggled with and his tenderness had soothed more than her bottom.
But she wasn’t out of the woods yet and she knew her new-found comforts would be short-lived. Old habits were hard to break and there would surely be icy roads ahead. So long as she kept learning from each mistake, this night would surely yield an end to certain things and a beginning to all which she had missed out on thus far – in life and perhaps in love as well.
The night had only just begun, but she felt she had all ready lived a new lifetime with him and because of him. The key to melting anything was patience and pressure – two things she had all ready received from him.
If she only knew all that lied ahead still that night, she might’ve moved more quickly towards the goal. But if she had done that, she might well have missed the lesson of the journey on the way to melting an ice queen.
Faith sat quietly and patiently as Guy turned onto the Route 87, though her mind was anything but quiet. And her reflections seemed to roll through each passing moment as if they were the memoirs of a life that didn’t know it had been pursuing anything in particular.
And in the current peacefulness, she finally had an opportunity to feel the hollow plug which kept her rosebud spread open. Initially, there was a pain as he inserted it, but she had grown used to the feeling, having had no other chance to focus in on it – given the spanking, the diapering and her lesson in waddling from the front door to his car.
But she contemplated what it would be like to lose control of her bowels. She certainly had been sick in her life and diarrhea was something everyone had experienced. But even in those moments, there was still a level of control – if only long enough to make it to the toilet.
The plug would take away her ability to hold it. That would be a truly helpless moment for her.
She thought of the diaper and the short dress he put her in, realizing how her waist would be the eye-candy of many passers-by – made more assured by the attention the white leggings would draw to her lower half.
The pacifier, still nestled in her lips, seemed to belong there more and more as she nursed from it. And that spanking just kept revisiting each and every impulse she had to say something snide. It was an experience which had modified her behavior, so far.
She looked over at him, wanting to know where they were going and wanting to know how else she would be made to feel on this night. She seemed less and less conflicted about being submissive, but that natural urge of independence would return. It was inevitable.
Pulling into the Buffalo Wild Wings parking lot, one of her questions was answered. Little did she realize as he found a space to park, how difficult it would be to put one foot in front of the other.
As he turned off the engine, he reached into the back seat, picking up the small back pack before getting out of the driver’s side and walked around to her door. He had been the perfect gentleman, opening the door when she got into the car and now opening it for her to get out.
Chivalry was something she had seen before, but her experiences with it always ended with someone wanting something for their kindness. It always put a damper on the charm, knowing there were motives behind it other than benevolence.
He extended his hand to her and she took it, spinning around to swing her legs out with scooching her sore bottom too much on the seat. She stood up and he shut the door, still holding her hand as he started walking towards the entrance.
But Faith had frozen in place, seeing the packed parking lot and doing the math to know that the restaurant would be packed as well.
“I can’t do this,” she said, removing the pacifier from her mouth. “I just can’t do it.”
“Yes, you can, Faith,” Guy said gently before continuing with a little more aggression to his tone. “And yes you will.”
The look in his eyes accomplished the desired effect on her defiance, but being a melting-ice-queen-in-training, she still had much to learn. And while it was an effective start, two spankings weren’t going to transform her.
Feeling trapped and threatened, Faith instinctively threw up the walls of ice in self-defense. This was where Guy reinvested in the patience and pressure method once more.
“Why do you feel you can’t go in?” Guy asked, calmly taking both of her hands and leading to the back of the car to get out of the way of other patrons looking for parking spaces.
“Why? Are you seriously asking me that?” Faith said with the return of her scowl and sass. “Look at me. You’ve diapered and dressed me up to be your baby doll.”
No, what I’ve done is to take you out of your element so you can conquer this mindset which has earned you the nickname of the Blonde Bitch all over town,” Guy said, realizing the harshness of his comment but seeing it as a necessity. “What I see inside you is a Princess who can’t find the crown that belongs on her head. You’ve settled for being seen as a bitch.”
“I am a bitch!” Faith shouted. “I’m a bitch, a cunt, a slut, a user, an abuser, a failure, a disappointment, a hopeless worthless pussy with too much baggage to be worth the trouble!”
His left hand cinched down on her left wrist as his right hand rose up and swung down, cracking the back of her thighs. She whimpered as she jumped, wanting to squeal from the pain, but not wanting to draw attention to herself.
His left hand cracked the back of her thighs a second time and she jumped again, covering his target with her right palm. He bent her over the trunk of the car, crossed her wrists at her lower back yet again and pinned her down.
His left hand delivered a powerful third blow which gave her no readjustment of attitude, nor anything to think about, at least not yet. Presently, all she could focus in on was the physical pain.
After that third strike, she stopped fidgeting as he began to unravel her mind and resistance just as before. And by the tenth strike of his hand, she was fully collapsed on the trunk of the car, trying desperately to keep consciousness from the overload of emotions and exhaustion.
He stood her to her feet and initiated the hug himself this time. She wrapped her around him, embracing him with as much need as before.
“I won’t let you give up,” Guy said, kissing to the top of her head. “You’ve done that too many times in your life. This time, you’re gonna win the battle.”
She whimpered into his chest, more hurt by her lack of self-esteem than from the pain.
“But I will melt you,” he said calmly. “And you will never be an ice queen again. I don’t care how long this takes.”
“Why do you care?” she sniffled, looking up at him.
“People can’t get through your walls. I’m sure that makes you feel safe,” Guy said, rocking her back and forth as he wiped the tears from her cheeks. “But the problem you face is that you can no longer get through your own walls, either.”
He took her hand again and began walking towards the entrance. And this time, she followed without any fuss or further self-damnation.
The Buffalo Wild Wings was definitely packed with football playing on every TV screen. Faith rolled her eyes at first, but quickly stopped before he saw. Looking out across the crowded seating area, she suddenly became quite shy, regressing to a state of mind she actually knew something about … insecurity. But this time, her insecurity appeared for different reasons.
In her mind, her waddle couldn’t have been wider and the damn plastic on the outside of her diaper couldn’t have crinkled any more loudly with each stride she took. She crushed herself up alongside him, gripping his body for comfort as they followed the waitress to the booth in the back of the room.
Passing through the center of the room, she kept her eyes on the floor, trying not to make visual contact with anyone. She had no idea if any of them were looking at her as they approached. She had no idea if any of them were looking at her after they walked past.
But her imagination had all ready decided that they all were looking at her. And this made her cling even more tightly to Guy. Sensing her nervousness, he reached behind her and patted her diapered bottom.
Oh, Holy Cow! Those pats shot her straight past the first stages of embarrassment and directly into super-humiliation mode. She was sure her face was bright pink and once again, she felt that strange tingle of pleasure in her center.
By the time they got to their booth, she wanted to crawl underneath it to hide. And probably would have if her mind hadn’t convinced her that she was now the only focal point of the entire room.
Guy sat on one side of the booth and she sat on the other. The waitress, set the menu in front of them and glanced down at Faith’s waist.
“Would you like a bib?” the waitress said to Faith with a confused grin on her face, but a grin nonetheless.
Faith looked up at her with a deer-in-the-headlights stare. She looked down at her lap, pulling the hem of her dress as far down her thighs as possible. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she breathed a few times through her nose, trying to slow her heavily-beating heart.
“Yes, she would,” Guy replied to the waitress, matter-of-factly.
Faith and the waitress both looked at him, but each had their own expression.
“Do you have any crayons?” Guy asked the waitress.
“I’ll bring her some,” the waitress said with a smile that she knew something was going on, but still uncertain. “Can I take your drink orders?”
“Yeah. I’ll take a Coke and …,” he replied, looking to Faith to answer.
“A root beer, please,” Faith said with such a whispered, small voice that she could barely be heard.
“I’ll … be right back,” the waitress said with a smile as she wandered over to the server’s station.
From their booth, Faith could see the waitress whispering to the other servers. Smiles were exchanged and looks were casually directed over towards their table.
Faith felt small. She felt helpless for sure and to that, she felt exposed, vulnerable and at any moment, prepared to be crushed with humiliation. Normally, she would’ve given that waitress attitude, further insulting her ass as she walked off to get the drinks.
Kindness certainly was a new way of approaching situations for her. And her instincts to bite were dulled. When the impulses to through the walls up came to her, she found that she suddenly didn’t have the will-power to do it. Guy sat across the table and kept eye-contact with her.
She was melting.
The waitress returned, setting the drinks down and placing the crayons in front of her. This time she tried not to look at Faith and obviously was trying to keep her smile in check.
She faced Guy who ordered a sampling of every single flavor of wings. Faith sat there, near the point of tears, wanting to pop off on the tootsie waitress girl. But she stayed quiet, partially from the memories of the spankings, partially from not being dressed in a manner to fight and partially for that strange fluttering she was getting in her stomach each time danger neared.
The waitress took the menus away with her.
“You did it,” Guy said with encouragement.
“I did what?” she asked with bewilderment.
“You didn’t lash out,” Guy answered.
“She wasn’t worth it,” Faith stated.
“What makes you say that?” Guy asked, picking up his straw.
“Everybody can see she’s a tart who gets attention from every cock that walks in here,” Faith said, picking up her straw. “And the worst part is: she doesn’t care what people think.”
“Do you think she’s really that kind of person?” Guy asked.
“No,” Faith replied honestly. “She’s probably a really nice girl, but she comes off as …”
Faith stopped in mid-sentence, realizing what she was about to say.
“She comes off as … an ice queen,” Guy said, completing her thought.
Faith set her straw down and leaned back in the booth, lost for words and for how to feel.
“It’s a bit different on this end of it. Isn’t it?” he asked.
“Do people think way about me?” she asked, bracing herself for tears, but knowing they would be the important tears she ever cried.
Guy didn’t answer. He couldn’t and he didn’t have to in order for her to understand. She looked out the window, trying to find some sort of distraction from the truth and the comfort she suddenly needed.
“Hey, rainy face,” he said softly, reaching across the table and take hold of both her hands. “Yesterday doesn’t matter anymore. And tomorrow has yet to be written. It’s up to you … today.”
She smiled as much as she could, but sadness had gotten the best of her. For as much as it was hard to see her upset, he knew it was part of what she needed to melt the ice. But this didn’t she had to stay sad.
“I’m going to show you something,” Guy said, picking up his straw and hers. “And it is the most important thing you will ever see in life.”
He held one straw in each hand and scrunched the paper on each down to the table. Taking the straws the rest of the way out of the paper and setting the two little scrunched up straw papers alongside one another, he handed her one of the straws.
“I’m gonna need your help to make this happen,” he said, putting a serious look on his face.
She looked at him like he was crazy.
“What I need you to do is fill your straw with your drink. Like this,” he said, placing the straw in his Coke, placing his finger across the end of the straw, and picking the straw up out of the drink – now filled with soda and being held in by the tip of his finger. “Like so.”
Faith did exactly as she did, sticking her straw in her root beer and putting her finger across the end of it, trapping the soda inside before lifting the straw out of the root beer.
“Now, watch very carefully. You’re going to need to do this exactly as I do this,” he said with such animation, she confirmed in her mind that he must be crazy.
He touched the bottom edge of his straw to the center of one of the scrunched up pieces of straw paper and he released his finger from the other end of the straw. The Coke came out of the straw and saturated the straw paper, making it grow and wiggle like a worm.
Her eyes grew wide and a smile came across her face as she tried the same with her straw paper, watching it grow in the same fascinating way.
What a fun moment it was. In hindsight, it would probably seem stupid, but most everything done in life seemed less important after the fact. What was most important was distracting her from her own guilt, long enough for her to get over it. And he had done just that.
The waitress brought the wings and her bib, offering to attach it around Faith’s neck. Faith smiled, lifted up her hair and allowed the waitress to dress her in the bib. What seemed like an impossible task to perform – enjoying the thrill of something while also learning an important lesson – had suddenly become a meal and a memory she would never forget.
They ate every wing and she even allowed herself to become a mess with hands and a face that made her an even more adorable sight than she all ready was. Getting to the hotter and spicier flavors, she forewent thee use of a straw and started chugging glasses of root beer at a time, but managed to get all the way to the Blazin’ flavor.
Before they left the Buffalo Wild Wings, Faith flipped her place mat over and drew the silliest picture of Guy that she could – complete with elf ears, a pig’s nose and eyes the size of hard boiled eggs. Guy took the place mat and promised to put it on his fridge.
As they exited the restaurant, Faith slowed her steps down just enough to allow herself the chance to pee. That was an experience all in itself and one she would think about at a later time. She was having too much fun to analyze anything else just then. And besides, her bladder needed relief.
Thinking their night was drawing to a close, Faith got in the car and stretched on the front seat. Little did she realize, there was one stop left and it would be there that her melting ice queen status would be tested. The choice of freeze or thaw would soon be in her hands and her hands alone. Thankfully, she would have Guy for support in her decision.
She really had to go. And while heading to the next stop on their night out, the countless glasses of root beer returned. Amazingly, her diaper held it all. And she was able to relax into the seat.
The night had proven to be exactly what she needed. Still uncertain what was to happen next or what she would think tomorrow morning, she basked in the contentment of knowing she was on the right track.
She looked over at Guy, realizing how impossible it would’ve ever been to break down her walls alone. And only someone like him, someone who knew the reasons why she had been an ice queen in the first place, could have gotten through to her.
They pulled up to a spot on the other side of the street from the front of the same bar they sat in last night when the bet was made. Faith looked at the front window, seeing the usual drunken suspects playing pool. Her tummy fluttered at the thought of walking in their dressed as she was. She waited patiently as he turned the car off, picked up the small back pack and got out, walking around to her side to open her door. And all the while that she waited, she stared at that front window, allowing her imagination to run wild.
She felt the strange tingle in her center again and smiled. This submission thing was not only becoming fun, but it was becoming a bit of fantasy that she craved. She knew all ready that many private moments with herself in the future would be spent recalling the events of this night, but the most powerful gratification of all awaited her inside that bar.
And as she took his hand to stand up, she had no idea of the intensely humiliating event which was about to happen. She just kept staring at the front window, even as he slipped his hand under the front of her dress and onto the diaper between her legs.
“You’ll be okay for a bit yet,” Guy said, patting her diapered bottom before taking hold of her hand and heading towards the front door.
She took two steps and her heart started pounding when she realized how her waddle was now different because of the wetness. Her imagination ran wild again as she thought of how embarrassing it would be to be discovered, not just in a diaper (which could be passed off as a prank or a costume or from a lost bet), but in a diaper which was soaking wet.
He opened the door and held it for her and she took one carefully step after another on her way in. Thankfully, the music was blaring as usual – keeping her crinkle to a less noticeable decibel. But her outfit wasn’t something she could, nor was her apparent new lack of attitude.
Normally, when she walked in that bar, she would blow past everyone to the bar side, not even making eye contact with the regulars.
But now, she stood there – one foot inside the front door, looking around at everyone, hoping there was at least one person there who didn’t view her the same way she viewed that waitress back at Buffalo Wild Wings.
The looks she from every set of eyes made her well up with tears. They scoffed at her, gave her an evil glare or laughed at how she was dressed. She didn’t have a single friend among anyone in that bar. And for the first time in the ice age of her life, she wished she hadn’t been so cold to people. She wished they knew how nice she could be, but she understood why they reacted to her so coldly.
Guy had never been more important to her than at that very moment. And this upset her, too. She had always taken him for granted. But as he led her to the bar side, his comment from the restaurant re-entered her conscience:
Yesterday doesn’t matter anymore. And tomorrow has yet to be written. It’s up to you … today.
“Going pink are we?” the bartender asked Faith, setting a Bud Light Lime in front of her and a Coors Light in front of Guy.
“I’m turning over a new leaf,” she said to him while sharing a smile with Guy.
“Come on, Guy. Let me have it,” the bartender said, motioning for him to hand over the small back pack.
Faith, held her lips together tightly, trying to hold back a smile.
“Why?” Guy asked, giving him the back pack.
“Don’t ask me?” Ask the Department of Homeland Security,” the bartender said, opening the back pack to look in.
Faith lowered her eyes and blushed. The bartender stared into the back pack for a few seconds and then over to her. She gave him no reaction other than a gentle, innocent grin.
Oh what a vulnerable moment. That bartender could’ve told the world. But he didn’t. Instead, he handed the back pack to Guy and returned to his work, pausing a moment to place his hand of Faith’s folded fingers which rested on the bar top.
“It must be one pretty leaf you’re turning over,” the bartender said to her. “But you’ve got a happiness in your eyes tonight I’ve never seen before. Whatever you’re doing and however you’re doing it, keep going. It looks like you’ve found the answers to a few things.”
She had another moment of reflection. That bartender extended a kindness to her that she never once gave back to him. He had ever right in the world to expose her, but he didn’t. And while it was easy to smile pretty for the camera when she needed to, the truth was: she hadn’t fooled anyone. Behind the scenes was where she lost her merit. And this had defined how she felt about herself.
“Let’s go shoot some darts,” Guy said, speaking up suddenly.
“Yeah,” she said, cheerfully, getting him and working her heavy diapered waddle to the electronic dart board in the corner.
“Cricket?” he asked her, suggesting a game to play.
“Sure,” she said with a bounce. “If you really wanna lose, go for it.”
He smiled and set up the game. She stood at the throwing line, squaring her shoulders away and releasing her three darts. Guy practically melted himself as he watched her waddle up to the dart board and stand on her tippy-toes to pull her darts out of the board.
She waddled back and handed him the darts, giving his bottom a pat for a change. He shook his head at her silliness and squared himself up before looking at the dart board and seeing that, with three darts, she had closed the 20, the 18 and the 15.
He looked back at her with disbelief and she smiled a contented grin before lifting up the front of her skirt to flash her diaper at him. He shook his head while laughing. Then he turned back to the dart board and, with three darts, closed the same numbers as she did.
Pulling his darts out, he returned to her with a contented smile, handing her the darts before patting her diapered bottom.
The challenge was on and for the next 14 games, they took turns showing each other up. By the 15th game, she had taken down quite a few beers and though her accuracy wasn’t as pristine, she was still competing just fine.
Mid-way through the game, she threw three darts that didn’t come near the marks she was aiming for. Waddling up to the board to pull them out, she relaxed her muscles and wet herself a bit more.
Reaching up to get the darts, she felt a momentary growl in her stomach and then her bowels released. She stopped stretching for the darts and stood perfectly still, thinking that if she clenched her cheeks together, the urge would pass long enough for them to get out of the bar.
But when she tried clenching her cheeks, she remembered that the hollow plug was still spreading her rosebud open and without another moment to think about it, she began filling the back of her diaper.
She couldn’t remember the last time she had messed herself and she didn’t know how to react to it now. Looking over both of her shoulders, she searched for Guy, trying to get his attention without calling for him. But he wasn’t in her peripheral.
She slowly turned around, but not slowly enough as her bowels continued releasing with each movement. Catching eyes with Guy, she was reduced to tears and she ran over to him, embracing him with sudden and overwhelming insecurity.
He held her tightly against, and after patting her diapered bottom once, realized what had happened.
“Don’t push it out,” he softly whispered in her ear. “Just let it happen.”
He rocked her gently as she gazed up at him. The look in her eyes showed how lost she felt, how scared was and how helpless her mind was making her.
But he kept the eye-contact with her, until the moment passed.
“That’s a good girl,” he said with a syrupy-sweet tone as he wiped the tears from her cheeks. “I’ve been very proud of you, tonight.”
Those brief words of praise meant more to her and struck into her heart more deeply than she could put to words. And if his actions were meant to melt her ice, then his words were meant to melt her heart.
He had done both.
“You ready to go?” he asked, softly.
She nodded, placing her head on his chest as they turned to head for the door. But as they turned, they came face-to-face with Mike, her most recent ex. The color left her face and if she had anything left in her bowels or bladder, she would’ve released it all at that moment.
For the first few seconds, Faith and Mike just looked at each other. No words were spoken. There was an understanding between them that she recognized was one that she had denied up until now.
“How ya doin’, Faith?” Mike asked with a demeanor showing that he missed her, but also one of self-defense.
It was clear she had hurt him in the wake of their separation. This is what she had always done to people when she was through with them. She waited for the right moment to pounce and those affected were left feeling worthless by her words of scorn.
Most ironically, all of her exes would find happiness after her. And Mike would, too, with time. Yet the pathway she was headed down would only yield temporary contentment for her. Until tonight happened, of course.
And standing in front of Ex #5, Faith finally saw the first step in the right direction.
“Mike, I want you to know that I’m sorry we didn’t work out,” she said to him. “I want you to know that I realize how I destroyed the good thing we had. You’re not perfect, either. And you know this. But I just want to tell you, I’m sorry for taking you for granted and for treating you like you never mattered to me. Because the truth is: you mattered more to me than anything else in this world.”
Mike stood silent and then walked away. Perhaps that was the toughest moment of the entire night. Spankings, anger, humiliation, self-hatred – she gladly would’ve endure a lifetime of all of those things, if it meant that she could’ve avoided the rejection she had just received.
She was a blubbering, bawling mess as he led her out of the bar and across the street to the car. But he didn’t open the front passenger’s door for her when they got to the car. He opened the back passenger’s door instead. She looked at him with confusion as he reached into the small back pack.
He took out her pacifier and touched its nipple to her lower lip.
“Open,” he whispered softly.
She parted her lips and timidly took the nipple in her mouth as he guided her down inside the car and onto her back on the back seat. She hadn’t pieced together what was about to happen until her flipped up the front of her dress and unfastened the tapes of her diaper.
She suddenly froze, still nursing her pacifier for comfort, but now searching through her mind to find comfort for being untaped. She had grown accustomed to that snugness of the diaper, even though she was wet and a mess. With those tapes unfastened, she lost the comfort to move.
Added into this was the fact that she was lying on the backseat of his car which was parked along the side of a street in town – just the width of the street and a sidewalk away from the entrance to the local bar. Anybody could’ve walked by. Perhaps even someone she knew and she was about to be exposed, even if just for a short time. Comfort was now absent and because of this, she began to whimper.
He set the small back pack on the floor behind the driver’s seat and got in the backseat with her, shutting the door and sitting along the edge of the backseat.
She looked up to him, desperate to tell him how uncomfortable she was, but it seemed she had lost the motor skill to do speak. Problem solving was now a jumbled mess of uncertain feelings. She was helpless, but to lie there and accept – through her tears and wounded emotions – that she was submissive to his wishes.
“Shh, shh, shh,” he shushed her, leaning in towards her face and brushing the tears from her cheeks.
Oh, that amazing shushing noise he made. She tingled in her center, her heart pounded for him and she regressed with unraveled sensations she could no longer articulate with any resemblance to being an adult.
At moments like this, when her mind no longer function with the efficiency it always had, she began to realize that submission wasn’t so much a journey to a new place as it was a meltdown from where she had always been.
She lied patiently, her arms bent at her elbows and her hands cupped into soft fists which rested along either side of her head. Her knees were slightly bent and her thighs were spread apart. She gazed up at him with watery eyes that were too warm to hold ice anymore.
“You’re being such a good girl,” he said as he reached into the small back pack and took out the last diaper he packed.
His syrupy tone sent flutters through her tummy and though she was no further away from danger than before, she felt miles away from anything which she knew would hurt her. So long as Guy was there, she would be safe.
He unfolded the new diaper and placed it flat on the back seat between her legs. His hand cupped her still-messy and still-diapered bottom, lifting her midsection up off the seat slightly as he slid the new diaper underneath her, lining the waistbands up.
And then, he took hold of the front of her diaper and folded it down, exposing her center and revealing the mess she was lying in. She hardly reacted to this new bit of stimulus at all. Her mind was lost in a safe place and her eyes were fixated on him. Acceptance was becoming as easy as fantasy while submission was becoming her reality.
“That’s a good girl,” he said softly as his hand traveled down to her rosebud.
He placed his finger around the edge of the hollow plug, the only portion of it that hadn’t entered inside her. Ever-so-gently and ever-so-slowly, he began pulling the hollow plug out.
She took in a nose-full of air to whimper.
“It’s okay. Just be a good girl for me,” Guys said with a tone so tender she could no longer resist anything he said.
She relaxed her frame, releasing all the muscle tension she had and softly exhaled as the hollow plug came out. The feeling of physical relief was very soothing as her rosebud returned to its usual tightness.
He took hold of her ankles and curled her legs up, rocking her back gently and lifting her bottom up. Taking the front of her diaper, he wiped away all the embarrassing evidence of how passive she had become. And with each stroke, her return to cleanliness welcomed back the comfort she had lost.
He took a wipe from the small pack and placed it directly on her rosebud, sore to touch but grateful for the coolness he was providing. She closed her eyes and relished in the relief as he took wipe to her bottom. And then that gloriously, sweet scent of powder filled the air as his fingers caressed her bottom.
Lowering her center and legs, she became nestled in the softness of a new diaper. Oh, what a wonderful feeling, one that started out foreign to her a few hours ago, but now was as familiar as home. And it was just as sweet.
The front of the new diaper was folded up and into place as he fastened the tapes at her hips and returned that snug feeling to her frame and its effect to her mind. His hand patted her newly diapered bottom, that final gesture of care which she had come to need.
Headed home, she remained clung to his side with time now to reflect fully and finally realize he was right all along. She had always been an ice queen. While nursing on her pacifier with teary eyes of her reflection, she admitted to herself that this one unforgettable night with him had made her happier than any other night she could remember.
Guy could’ve rubbed it in, but it was the kindness within him which prevented him from doing so. Besides, being right was the point of all of this for him. This night was an intervention she would’ve gotten nowhere else – not for how unraveling and unorthodox it may have been viewed as but because it was something from which she actually learned a lesson.
He walked her up to her front door and gave her a hug good night.
“I hope you never find ice again, Faith,” Guy said. “Except in your drinks. And I want you to remember that I’m always going to be your friend. I’m always going to care about you. And I’ll always show you the way back, should you ever get lost again. No matter what it takes.”
“Do you think you could show me the way to my bedroom?” she asked suggestively as she handed him the front door key.
He smiled, taking the key and unlocking her front door.
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” he asked.
“No,” she admitted, lowering her chin and folding her hands in front of her. “It’s not a good idea. It’s a great idea.”
“Why?” Guy asked, playing a little game of reversed hard-to-get.
“Besides, I need my diapered changed again,” she finally confessed. “You see, I’m not icy anymore. I’m melted. That means I’m wet.”
She lifted her eyes up to him and the twinkle of lust danced across her irises.
“You melted me,” she said as the tingle washed over her center again. “Now, I’m yours … Daddy.”
He lifted her up into his arms and she willingly wrapped her arms around his neck.
“Be a good girl for Daddy,” Guy said as he carried her inside the house.
If you’re a fan of the darker age play, I would also recommend reading:
The Voice – A tale of horror, unavoidable consequences and possible redemption of self.