No, this is not a posting about the basics of anything … other than yourself. It also is not a DIY, for as much as it actually is that very thing. LOL Cryptic enough? Let me explain …
A 101 document is a document you write about you, about who you are and what you like and what you don’t like. And that’s pretty much it, except that it can be so much more … if you want it to be.
I’m sure this is not a new concept, but I first heard about it when doing a podcast episode with Little Philly last month. He called his document The LittlePhilly 101 Document. It is a constantly-growing and constantly-changing writing about his little side. And it goes very in-depth, explaining everything someone would want to know about his little side.
So far, you may be thinking “Okay. And what is your point? Why are you writing about this?” But if you think about it, writing such a document about one’s self has multiple purposes and multiple benefits. Consider these questions for a moment:
Have you ever had trouble filling out an about me section in a profile? It should be a simple task. You are writing about you.
Or have you ever had trouble limiting what you write about yourself? I am guilty of this one, myself. It is an art form to write enough words to encourage someone to contact you but not so many words as to leave nothing to talk about when messaged by others.
Have you ever had trouble describing yourself and your interests when messaging with someone, perhaps someone you found interest in? That is an “on the fly” problem, not being able to come up with the words when in a situation where it would be beneficial for you to be able to do so.
Have you ever wanted someone to do certain things with you or for you, but were fearful to ask?
Have you ever wanted someone to refrain from doing certain things with you or for you, but were fearful to ask?
Do you have trouble communicating with people about yourself?
Do you have anxieties in social settings or anxieties about conversing with others?
Or just simply … Could you put to words who you are?
A 101 document could help with, if not solve, a lot of the problems the above questions raise. It would also help with clarity, if you give details – not just a broad, bulleted list of what you like. Without clarity, confusion can ensue. Let me give you a personal example about this.
I have often stated that: “I don’t like BDSM or anything that is painful like that”. A more descriptive answer would be: “I have a weak stomach and can’t be near anything BDSM-like that is (or looks) physically painful. It is to the point of my own discomfort to even be remotely close to it – whether it is spanking or clamping or torturous things like that. The best I can do is to view those types of actions from a distance.”
You see how details make something clearer? And as an acquaintance stated to me last year, there are tons of examples of BDSM that have nothing to do with physical pain.
So how would this benefit someone to create such a list about their little side? By putting details along with statements like: “I like to be a baby.” That’s a statement that really doesn’t explain much of anything. And it could also lead to confusion. Some people have no interest in acting like a baby, but thoroughly enjoy feeling like one. This is a good thing to let a partner know. If you don’t babble or like to communicate with baby talk or play with toys or … LOL … whatever being a baby means to you, a partner would be benefited a lot in having this information. It would also clear up concerns a potential partner would have, right from the get-go. Maybe that potential partner is looking for a diaper lover but not so much an adult baby. And perhaps their reasoning for this is that someone who fully acts out the baby role can be exhausting to a caregiver. If you explain to them that you are not someone who acts like a baby, it could eradicate that concern and lead to further discussions with that person.
That’s a very realistic scenario, right there. How many times have you been messaging with someone and then they suddenly stopped replying? Do you know the reason why they stopped replying? Maybe this was the reason. Maybe you told them that you like to act like a baby and they interpreted that to mean that you run all over the place like a toddler and misbehave.
To the flip thought of all of that … maybe a potential partner is looking for someone who really wants to be in the little mindset as often as possible. If you are a diaper lover with no real interest in being an adult baby, this would be a good thing to let someone like that know early on.
If someone asks you: “What is it about being an ABDL that you like?” … that’s a very broad question. But with a 101 document, you would have the ability to reply with an informative answer. You would have details at your fingertips, at all points in time.
It also can clear up misconceptions people may have about you. Here’s another personal example:
I have heard from folks who believed I was an avid fan of the actions that characters make in the stories I write. If this was the truth, I would then have to be interested in BDSM-like activities (bondage, spanking, discipline, training, etc.), romantic and/or sexual encounters, pure-n-innocent encounters, humiliation, regression, forced regression, diapers, public embarrassment, cribs, nurseries, high chairs, car seats, late-night trips to superstores, 24/7 lifestyle, switching, BabyGirls, BabyBoys, Mommies, Daddies, AB, DL, AB and DL.
In truth, I like some of that. But not all of it.
Little Philly’s take on the 101 document and the reason why he wrote one for himself … well, let me just quote him exactly from that podcast:
So, there is a document that exists called ‘Little Philly 101’ which is basically everything there is to know about me as a little. I wrote it a long time ago and I have since updated it continuously and doing something like that is really good because if you’re gonna get into a relationship with someone or you’re gonna play with somebody, take the time to sit down and create your 101. Tell people what you like, what you don’t like. Tell people your limits, what you’re afraid of, what you’re not afraid of, what your favorite snacks are, what are your favorite movies. What type of diapers do you like?
Be very specific. “I like to be tucked in for naps.” Put in as much information as possible. Put this in an email draft or save it on your computer as a document. And then when you’re talking to someone for a possible relationship, you can send that to them and they can read over it. And they can actually see that, “Wow there’s all these things we have in common!”
It’s sometimes easier to send that to someone than to sit down with someone and say it all. You can even put things on there that would be too embarrassing to talk about with words. So, it’s a good way to communicate. And then ask the person that you’re communicating with to do the same thing. And ask them to send you a 101 on what they’re all about.
So what types of things would go in a 101 document? The possibilities are endless and the list will be personal to you. But here are some suggestions:
- Items you like (diapers, stuffies, pacifiers, clothing, blankets, toys, adult toys, darker equipment, sippy cups, baby bottles, jewelry, etc.)
- The names of your stuffed animals
- The meaning of your username
- What you little name is, if it’s different from your everyday name
- What things you can’t be without, your must haves
- What things you love
- What things annoy you, your can’t stands or deal breakers
- What things are triggers for you
- Favorites (such as foods, movies, music, TV shows, hobbies, drinks)
- What makes you shy
- What brings out your personalities
- Your little personality as versus your everyday personality … if there is a difference.
- The first thing you think about when you wake up
- The last thing you think about before you go to sleep
- Things you dream about when sleeping
- Things you daydream about
- Your origin story, with regards to ABDL or perhaps something else
- How often you feel little
- How often you wear diapers – or maybe you don’t wear diapers at all
The list could be endless.
With a 101 document, you have absolute control of being able to communicate with someone. If you struggle with it face-to-face, you can overcome that struggle by writing it down.
But don’t just write it and then that’s it. Allow it to be a living document, one that changes as you change, one that will require additions and deletions in order to be an accurate representation of you, currently.
So keep up with it. And let it evolve as you evolve.
But nothing is perfect and there are concerns that could rise from such a writing. If you write to someone and say: “Hello, my name is so-and-so. Below, I have listed my 101 document. Please read over it and get back to me, if interested.”
If someone was to send you that message, would you be inclined to reply back to them or even interested at all in reading that person’s 101 document?
With that thought in mind, I offer up these suggestions:
- Let this 101 document be a garnishment to your conversations. Don’t allow it to replace actual conversation and communication with someone. Let it add to your interactions as opposed to replacing them.
- Do not assume that people will memorize your 101 document. While it would be good for them to read, it would turn out to be the opposite for them if they then received a quiz from you about it.
- This document is an informational one about you, not a guidebook for how someone should treat you. And it would be a good thing to foster further and more in-depth conversations. But don’t expect people, particularly folks you may spend time with, to read and then suddenly follow what is in your 101 document – verbatim.
There’s a level of down-to-Earth brilliance about a 101 document and hopefully, it will be something that some of you will find useful in your lives – if you haven’t already created such a document about yourself.
YOU are a very interesting subject to write about. So, enjoy the endeavor.
Blessings to you all,